On the joys of sellotape

Sellotape is great stuff. I mean truly great stuff. Duct tape or Gaffer tape tend to get all the major credit, but sellotape is just cool. Okay so it may not be as strong as those other types, but its see-through... that's gotta be worth extra points. I mean, if you break someone's window and try mending it with duct tape, they'll notice immediately, sellotape however is see-through so it could give extra vital seconds in which to make your escape.

That is of course, only if they don't spot the huge discarded ball of stuck-together-sellotape you threw into the corner. Its actually been proven to be a mathematical impossibility to use sellotape without the stuff bending over at some point and sticking to itself.

In fact one of the greatest skills of sellotape is sticking to itself; I think that's probably the thing it does best. Unfortunately I'm not aware of any situation that actually calls for sellotape to be stuck to itself; most of the time you wish to stick it to other things, but its good to be top in something. And anyway, sticking to itself does come in slightly useful...

How about those times it decides to do that endless role trick it does; where it hides the edge of the tape inside itself, even though you only had it a minute ago. There really is nothing quite like the feeling of running your nail round and round the roll trying to feel the bump of the join; knowing it must be there somewhere, but totally failing to find it. There comes to be a point in time, when you've run each finger around in both directions and still you can't find it. You can even find yourself wondering if the end has somehow fallen off, or if you've thrown it away or its stuck it on the underside of the scissors.

Of course when you do find the end, you'll have lost the scissors, because they've managed to stick themselves to your elbow along with a spare bit of tape, which you wont notice for hours. But because you've now got the tape unravelling you decide to break it by biting, a technique that invariably goes horribly wrong. Whilst the tape may break, a small triangle of it will stick to your lip, a piece thats large enough to feel, but small enough not to see. And in your efforts to flick it off your lip; the selotape will decide to stick to itself again. At this point you may wish to give up on sellotape, but you shouldn't.

Without selotape things could never be put together on a semi-permanent basis, unless you used the far less practical glue.
Presents couldn't be wrapped. Things at school could never have been made. You'd never be able to find years old craft makes. Makes which are now held together by yellow, unsticky, and slightly smelly, selotape.

So don't forget good ole' Sellotape: Number one object for sticking to sellotape.